Last week was Date #28! Whoop whoop! This was the date where I met Lewis, a sweet, genuine scholastic and counselor in training. If you haven't read that date yet, stop everything you're doing and read it. Critics (my family) claim it's "funny," "one of your better posts" and my mom even said, "very darling and I love it, Xo." So yeah, you're going to want to check that out. Anyway, Lewis was a great sport and since we talked so much about this blog on our date, I decided to give him the opportunity to write a post of his own. I am happy to say that he accepted the challenge.
So without further adieu, here is Lewis's side our date:
I went into our date knowing a few pieces of information: Isabel is an actor with an entertaining blog about her dating life, a budding career in Los Angeles, and, according to our matchmaker, a genuinely kind person. Two days before our date I discovered, via her Instagram, that Isabel just turned 23 years old. I am, ahem, nearing 38 which is nearing 40 which is definitely kind of old. Maybe our matchmaker filled Isabel in on this detail, but I figured I’d offer Isabel the chance to ask me for anything about my life prior to our date. She declined and suggested it’d be fun to get to know each other in person. Her willingness to meet without knowing much about me suggested she was confident and bold!
Our date involved masked social distancing, a walk with Freddie, and a cup of iced coffee from a cute French cafe. We found a shady spot on some grass to escape the heat (84 degrees is practically boiling for a Portlander like myself) and talked about a range of topics for roughly an hour and a half: religion, childhood memories, dating experiences, the importance of Black Lives Matter, our professional lives and more. Freddie patrolled the perimeter and warded off any of the other furry creatures around us, occasionally showing off his ferocious bark and impressive charging skills.
I had a feeling Isabel and I might have a mutual friend based on her age and where she grew up. Actually, it would be less of a mutual friend and more of a person, or family, we both knew. In my early 20s, I worked as a nanny (or “manny”) for a family in her neighborhood. The family had a few children around Isabel’s age, and I assumed they attended the same elementary school. It turns out Isabel knew this family too! Although this was a pretty fun topic to discuss given the legitimately hilarious nature of the family, it was also a moment where I felt… old. Isabel never made me feel awkward or uncomfortable about our age difference.
As a counselor in training near the end of my program and someone who regularly sees a therapist for personal as well as professional reasons, I’m used to talking about therapy and personal growth. As I have found out the hard way, it turns out that not all dates are comfortable, willing, or able to talk about these serious and important topics. Isabel, however, seemed very comfortable sharing about her experience in therapy and insights she has gained during sessions. This points to Isabel’s maturity and self-awareness, qualities not always found in your typical 23-year-old.
As any reader of this blog can pick up, and anyone who knows Isabel in real life certainly knows, Isabel has a pretty great sense of humor. While we talked about plenty of serious topics, we also talked about our favorite movies and TV shows. I knew Isabel liked Napoleon Dynamite, possibly the pinnacle of comedy in my non-professional opinion, so I was curious about her other top choices. She recommended Nathan For You, a truly ridiculous show worth checking out.
For both me and Isabel, finding the right person seems to be the end goal of this journey called dating. Along the way, dating can also be an opportunity to discover more about ourselves and to tease out what we want from life as well as our partner. As a divorcee, these kinds of positive dates kindle my hope for a future relationship. A successful date sometimes means meeting a kind soul on a similar path even if our paths may not merge in the future. This persistent, bold, and creative gal is going to find her suitor one of these days, and I’ll be cheering her on the whole way!
It's me again, Isabel!
A HUGE thank you to Lewis for writing this wonderful piece! To Lewis - I hope you know that I am cheering you on too!
Also, stay tuned for Date #29! I am going on a socially-distant beach walk with a man from Hinge! Wish me luck!
Best,
Isabel