4 dates down, 48 to go. Woof.
Key Takeaways: I have realized that people appreciate it when you tell them how you really feel.
Here are my dates by the numbers
Total number of miles driven: 39 miles
Total time spent on dates: 12 hours, 17 minutes
Dates where I mentioned tortoises in some way: 4
Drinks I ordered:
1 Oat Milk Vanilla Latte
After the Final Rose:
After the date, Arnold reached out asking about a second. I then explained, in the nicest way possible, that I thought we had a great conversation but didn’t have chemistry. Then he said that he felt the same way! He explained that he thought a second date would be a good idea to know with certainty that there wasn’t a romantic connection. So, we both felt the same way, which was really nice.
After posting Date #2, Wayne texted me to set up another date and I was excited. Then the day of the date he asked for a rain check. “No problem. I am flexible” I said. Since then I haven’t heard back from Wayne. True be told, it has made me a little sad. I mean, it’s possible that he has been busy with work and hasn’t been able to get back to me. It’s possible that he thought there wasn’t chemistry. I might also be because of this blog. Whatever his reasoning, I am okay with it. I have respect for any guy who willingly goes on a date with me knowing that I will be writing about it.
We are still friends. In fact, we are working on another project together. As far as his 2002 Kia Spectra, he brought it to the shop!! They told him it doesn’t have much time left… but it was a step in the right direction. Go John go!
I texted Luke a similar message to the one I sent Arnold and he said: “Thanks for the honesty, wishing the best for you.”
I have realized that people appreciate it when you tell them how you really feel. When I asked people on the Date a Week LA Instagram what I should say to my dates instead of ghosting them, I got some feedback. Here were real answers from my loyal followers:
“Say ‘I’m sorry I don’t think this is going to work out’ or something like that.’”
“Literally say anything. Communicating > not communicating.”
“Hey, I’m so glad you reached out. I’m actually at capacity right now, and I don’t think I can.”
“Send them the ghost emoji.”
“Tell them you’re dead.”
I thought these were all great pieces of advice… minus the last two.
Getting your feedback about this journey is helpful; looking for love and facing the prospect of 52 dates can be emotionally draining. If I hadn’t made a commitment to going on a date a week, I might have backed off seeking out dates for a while. But I can feel you all cheering me on, so thanks everyone for reading and responding.
Up next, Date #5 at The Roger Room in West Hollywood...